Sharing Kenpo with your spouse

I was just thinking about creating a similar thread and stumbled on this one so I figured I would give it a bump. I started training in Tracy's Kenpo about a year ago (I trained previously in Kajukenbo and EPAK), and interestingly enough, about six months ago my wife expressed an interest in training in something. On her own, she found a Krav Maga school and she signed up for a trial lesson. The class was really physically beyond her capabilities, but at the time, the fact that there was a heavier emphasis on the physical conditioning aspects of the training than on the self-defense aspect was appealing to her. Due to costs, she decided not to sign up long term, but initially she thought that she might go back to the Krav school at a later time.

About six months ago, she experienced a bit of a road rage scare, and she had a guy threaten to pull her out of the vehicle she was driving. She dealt with that situation by pulling out a machete that I stashed in the truck and informing her woud-be attacker that anything that came into the vechicle would be hacked off, so he backed down. However, the discomfort that she experienced in that situation was enough to make her decided to change her focus from fitness to self-defense. And, since I was already training, this created the opportunity for a family rate that made more sense for our family. I do think that intially she had some concerns about invading "my space", but I was able to convince her that there was enough room in the dojo for the both of us.

So, now she has been training for about three months, and I am loving the fact that we can share this art! However, similarly to what the OP said, I am finding that while I LOVE THIS STUFF, it's just "ok" to her, and I have quickly figured out that I have to be OK with that if there is any chance of her sticking with this. I can quickly irritiate her with too much "Kenpoese", and if I dare to suggest to her that we practice together, that can lead to THE LOOK (married guys know the look). But, every so often, she surprises me and while watching a fight scene on TV, she'll say things like "That looks like the Knee of Vengeance" or "what is the name of that technique where the attacker grabs you on the right shoulder"... So, I am learning to take it as it comes - If she sticks with it, then great. If not, then at least she will (hopefully) have an idea or two if she god forbids ever has to defend herself physically, and at least she will have some ideas about what it is that drags me away from the family for so many evenings/weekends.

Thanks for sharing the story. In my mind though the self defense and fitness should not be mutually exclusive.

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I agree 100%, and I am not suggesting that there is not a fitness component at the dojo we train at because there most certainly is. However, the Krav school that my wife was considering was MOSTLY focused on fitness and self-defense is more of a by-product, and our school is focused on self-defense with fitness being a side effect our class warmups/basics.

Greetings,

I tried to get my wife interested Kenpo but to no avail. She is my biggest supporter. Even though I was a little dissapointed I am grateful she knows what she likes and dislikes. I'd hate to have her go into Kenpo just for my account and then didn't like it.

YBIK