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Thread: Obituary of the Late Mr. Common Sense

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Sarnia, ON, Canada
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    Default Obituary of the Late Mr. Common Sense

    While this isn't very funny there was no better place to put it.

    Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
    has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was,
    since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

    He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
    Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the
    worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but
    overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 -year-old
    boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens
    suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
    job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly

    It declined even further when schools were required to get parental
    consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student;
    but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

    Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became
    contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better
    treatment than their victims.

    Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
    burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

    Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed
    to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little
    in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

    Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust;
    His wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
    He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.

    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.If
    you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do

    Unknown author.
    Quality outweighs quantity every time.

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Rob Broad For This Useful Post:

    robertk (10-24-2009),tiktok86 (02-28-2007)

  3. #2
    tiktok86's Avatar
    tiktok86 is offline
    Adv. Orange Belt
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    May 2006
    Martinez, CA
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    Default Re: Obituary of the Late Mr. Common Sense

    Thanks for that post, very good read. And yes, while definitely tongue-in-cheek, it resonates with just a bit too much truth for my liking...
    All difficult things have their origin in that which is easy, and great things in that which is small. - Lao Tzu

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Sarnia, Ontario, Canada
    Thanked 675 Times in 490 Posts

    Default Re: Obituary of the Late Mr. Common Sense

    There is nothing so strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength.
    Unquestionably man has his will - but woman has her way! - Bruce Lee

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    My own private Idaho
    Thanked 3,587 Times in 2,193 Posts

    Default Re: Obituary of the Late Mr. Common Sense

    It's a shame that it can't be looked at as humor. I found it to be pretty spot on.

  6. #5
    Texas Kenpo is offline
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    Default Re: Obituary of the Late Mr. Common Sense

    Way too much truth in that.

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