Results 1 to 11 of 11

Thread: To make you smile

  1. #1
    gimpat01's Avatar
    gimpat01 is offline
    KenpoTalk
    2nd. Brown Belt
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    795
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 12 Times in 10 Posts

    Default To make you smile

    LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE (borrowed this from another forum)

    1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

    2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

    3. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!

    4. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

    5. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

    6. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

    7. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

    8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

    9. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

    10. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing.

    11. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

    12. NyQuil, the nighttime, sniffling, sneezy, your a** is sleeping right here on the kitchen floor time medicine.


    13. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

    14. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

    15. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

    16. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

    17. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!

    18. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

    19. Procrastinate Now!

    20. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

    21. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

    22. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance

    23. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

    24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.

    25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

    26. Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

    27. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

    28. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.

    29. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.
    "Second chances they don't never matter, people never change
    Once a whore you're nothing more i'm sorry that'll never change
    And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged
    I'm sorry honey, but i'm passing up, now look this way...*" --Paramore "Misery Business"


    (*this is where a punch would be landed)

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Hoth
    Posts
    2,211
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 81 Times in 71 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    Some of these never get old I have a banner rotation on my blog with stuff like this...there's gotta be over 200 of them
    Susan A. Spann

    Something Here Coming Soon

    Member of the Estrogen Mafia and Proud Owner of THIS Thread (FOREVER D:< )



  3. #3
    gimpat01's Avatar
    gimpat01 is offline
    KenpoTalk
    2nd. Brown Belt
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    795
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 12 Times in 10 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    I know, some I still laugh at even though I've read them over and over and over again. Maybe I'm just way too easily amused.
    "Second chances they don't never matter, people never change
    Once a whore you're nothing more i'm sorry that'll never change
    And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged
    I'm sorry honey, but i'm passing up, now look this way...*" --Paramore "Misery Business"


    (*this is where a punch would be landed)

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Hoth
    Posts
    2,211
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 81 Times in 71 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    Then you, too, must suffer from Shiny Object Syndrome (SOS). All someone has to do in order to distract you is to jangle keys in front of your face.

    Our mascot is Kiki from Sluggy Freelance. www.sluggy.com
    Susan A. Spann

    Something Here Coming Soon

    Member of the Estrogen Mafia and Proud Owner of THIS Thread (FOREVER D:< )



  5. #5
    gimpat01's Avatar
    gimpat01 is offline
    KenpoTalk
    2nd. Brown Belt
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    795
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 12 Times in 10 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    my mother always teases me that I must be part gypsy, cause I love shiny objects. Go figure *stares off at Miyu's keys jingling in distance*.
    "Second chances they don't never matter, people never change
    Once a whore you're nothing more i'm sorry that'll never change
    And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged
    I'm sorry honey, but i'm passing up, now look this way...*" --Paramore "Misery Business"


    (*this is where a punch would be landed)

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Hoth
    Posts
    2,211
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 81 Times in 71 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    If you like staring at my keys, you'll like staring at my charm bracelet - it has pictures from my gallery
    Susan A. Spann

    Something Here Coming Soon

    Member of the Estrogen Mafia and Proud Owner of THIS Thread (FOREVER D:< )



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Sarnia, ON, Canada
    Posts
    7,774
    Thanks
    301
    Thanked 1,263 Times in 801 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    A blonde get easily distract? This can't be true, it must be an urban legend.
    Quality outweighs quantity every time.

  8. #8
    gimpat01's Avatar
    gimpat01 is offline
    KenpoTalk
    2nd. Brown Belt
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    795
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 12 Times in 10 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    All I'm gonna say is read my new signature
    "Second chances they don't never matter, people never change
    Once a whore you're nothing more i'm sorry that'll never change
    And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged
    I'm sorry honey, but i'm passing up, now look this way...*" --Paramore "Misery Business"


    (*this is where a punch would be landed)

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Orlando, Florida
    Posts
    6,026
    Thanks
    1,199
    Thanked 1,520 Times in 909 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    How about this one:

    If breathing were not an involuntary function, many would fall over dead.
    "It is sobering to reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence." – Charles A. Beard

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Hoth
    Posts
    2,211
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 81 Times in 71 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    Oh we could hope...don't tease me with such possibilities!
    Susan A. Spann

    Something Here Coming Soon

    Member of the Estrogen Mafia and Proud Owner of THIS Thread (FOREVER D:< )



  11. #11
    Seig is offline
    KenpoTalk
    Adv. Blue Belt
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Martinsburg, WV
    Posts
    453
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 4 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: To make you smile

    Two fo my favorites:
    Your village called, their idiot is missing.
    Yor proctologist called, he says he found your head.
    Just because you do something one way, does not mean that everyone else does it that way, or that it is even the correct way.

Remove Ads

Sponsored Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 24
    Last Post: 01-10-2011, 02:11 AM
  2. Replies: 6
    Last Post: 09-25-2006, 07:30 PM
  3. Make up Techniques
    By Tigerstripes in forum Kenpo General
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 02-15-2006, 10:46 PM