GWB APPOINTS HANNIBAL LECTER SURGEON GENERAL



In a bi-partisan move, President Bush nominated Dr. Hannibal

Lecter as his candidate for US Surgeon General.



"I think Dr. Lecter will serve with pride, fava beans, and a nice

Chianti," Bush announced.



In another announcement, Special Agent Clarice Starling will

become the new FBI director. She's expected to work closely

with the new Surgeon General on a case concerning missing

former Vice President Al Gore. President Bush had recently

arranged a meeting between Gore and Lecter.



Lecter was the last person to see Gore before Gore's sudden

disappearance in early January. Lecter noted that he, "enjoyed

having Gore for dinner," but was upset at how Gore, or, rather

the *subect* of Gore kept "coming up." "I'm sick to my

stomach over this," Lecter said.



President Bush didn't seem concerned with the disappearance

of his rival for the office. "I think it's all crap by now, don't you?"